


The Gift

by spikesredqueen



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Angst, Light Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-30
Updated: 2015-12-30
Packaged: 2018-05-10 11:17:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,335
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5583787
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spikesredqueen/pseuds/spikesredqueen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Spike doesn't understand what all the holiday fuss is about until he receives a special gift. Set during season 7 of BtVS when Spike is living in Buffy's basement.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Gift

**Author's Note:**

> Written in response to a mod challenge at LJ community nekid_spike. The challenge was: "Something festive involving an exchange of gifts (Christmas/Hanukkah) between Spike & Willow would be wonderful. I'd prefer something happy rather than angsty if possible please. Whatever rating you want to go with is fine."
> 
> As always beta'd by the fabulous OKDeanna

The holidays. Christmas lights hanging about, people singing about bloody holiday cheer, and thoughts of sugar plums dancing in the heads of kids. A bunch of nonsensical drivel if you asked him. What was the point of it all? He wasn’t human anymore and hadn’t been for a long time now. His vampire family all but deserted him… he couldn’t blame Drusilla though; he had betrayed her in an attempt to show the Slayer how he cared about her couple years back. That didn’t really go as planned, though. 

Nothing ever goes to plan for him, does it?

Spike sighed, leaning back against the stone wall while he sat on the small cot in the basement of Buffy’s home. While the others are upstairs celebrating with gifts, food, and mistletoe, he was brooding here like Angel. In a dark, dank room remembering everything that he had done wrong and wondering what could have been had things gone right for him before he got his soul. 

It made him feel sick. The possibilities would have been endless had the fates allowed. 

Just as he was about to get out of bed to go get some fresh air, there was a gentle knock on the basement door before it slowly opened and shut behind whoever entered.

It took only moments before her scent invaded his space. He didn’t have to see her to know it was the witch. Willow. It was a scent he could never forget, especially when she was frightened. It wasn’t like most. She had a unique smell, strawberries and vanilla… peaches and cream… lavender and chamomile… soft and sweet scents. Funny thing was, it varied with her emotions and her use of magic. It was never the same. Over time, Spike had begun to familiarize himself with a few of them and tonight, she seemed uneasy. 

“What can I do for you, Red?” Spike’s eyes followed her form as she made her way down the stairs, until she stood in front of him. He had to admit her taste in clothing improved over the years, the jeans she wore fit snuggly around her long legs and her top fit her just right. Though he found himself wondering if she still kept the fluffy get up she wore when he kidnapped her a few years ago. Admiration aside, he was more curious about what she was doing down here… with a plate of what looked like chocolate chip cookies on a platter.  
Her heart was racing and she seemed hesitant before she spoke. He hadn’t seen her this anxious in a while. 

“I...I made you some cookies,” she mentioned softly before handing them over to him. He took a cookie, placing it into his mouth before setting the plate on a small table beside the cot. Something told him that wasn’t the only reason she came to see him. “I didn’t know what else to get you for a present.”

Spike felt his heart expand that she even thought about him. While he and Buffy were on slightly better terms lately, what with all they have been through together, she hadn’t come to see him in a few days or even said Merry Christmas to him. It felt nice to have someone think of him like that. To consider what he would want or need. It was sweet of Willow.

Spike felt a small smile tugging at the corners of his mouth for the first time in ages. 

“Thanks, Red. That’s thoughtful of you.”

That brought a smile to her face, making her eyes light up even in the dim light in the room. “I remembered you liked them the last time I made cookies. Mind if I sit?” She asked, motioning toward the space beside him on the bed. 

Spike gave a nod and she sat beside him, moving her palms over her denim covered thighs. The wheels in her head were certainly turning and her heart rate increased ever so slightly.

“Somethin’ on your mind, love?”

She didn’t seem too shocked that he knew she wanted to talk about something. Instead, she seemed relieved. Perhaps she hadn’t known how to begin the conversation.

“I’ve been thinking a lot lately.” She said the words as if they were a confession. 

He arched a brow, curiosity getting the better of him. “Yeah? What about?” 

“You… well, more specifically about what would have happened had you turned me in the dorms.”

Well, color Spike surprised. He hadn’t expected that to be the topic of the conversation. 

“You were telling the truth weren’t you? About making me like you?”

The hope in her voice didn’t go unnoticed by the vampire. 

Spike nodded. “Yeah, I was tellin’ the truth, pet. I would’ve turned you if it weren’t for this bloody chip, and we would have had our fun in Sunnyhell and travelled the world. Together.” Tilting his head, he considered her carefully. “What brought this about?”

Willow shrugged a shoulder ever so slightly before meeting his eyes. “What if we missed our chance? What if our happiness was changed all because of that moment when you couldn’t bite me?” 

It was clear to him what she meant. She meant her not meeting Tara and the possibility of not being broken from Tara dying in her arms. It meant that Spike would have had someone who would be with him forever and possibly loving him. He wouldn’t have suffered with his soul and Buffy would still be his enemy instead of the woman he… yeah, he loved her… cared for her. But as much as he wanted it to be real, it wasn’t. She wasn’t in love with him and never would be.

Instinctively, he wrapped his arm around her shoulders and brought her closer. Resting his chin atop of her head, he inhaled deeply, taking in her scent. “I don’t think we’ve missed our chance at happiness, Red. It’ll happen when it’s mean to be for both of us.” 

“It scares me, you know?” 

Leaning back enough to look at her face, he waited for her to continue.

“The possibility that I could find happiness with you, if I let myself. If you wanted me, too.” 

What was he to say to that? Truth be told, the more he thought about it, the possibility scared him as well. The attraction to her was there, no doubt about that. She was different from the others, always had been. Willow was the one who was always on his mind, even when he was looking for Buffy. 

Was she confessing she may feel something for him? 

Spike knew that no one had truly loved him like that. Not like Willow could love him. When she loved, it was with all her heart and soul. She had her flaws, but didn’t everybody? Spike was far from perfect but she never threw that in his face, did she? No, she knew no one was perfect and didn’t expect them to be.

Cupping her face, he gave her a warm, yet nervous, smile, “Frightens me, too. Maybe we can be scared together, hm?”

“What about Buffy? Don’t you still love her?”

“I do. Just like I love Dru. But they will never love me, not like you could. No matter what I do, I’ll never be good enough.” He paused for a moment, making sure she heard what he was saying to her. “You’ve never thought of me as someone unworthy of being loved. You treated me like a man and vampire, one and the same. Never expected me to be anything but me. That, Willow, is the greatest gift anyone has ever given to me.” 

Tears brimmed her emerald eyes as she leaned in and placed a gentle kiss upon his lips. 

As Spike returned the tender form of affection, the partially eaten cookie fell to the floor, forgotten. Maybe there was more to this holiday than he thought. A chance at real love? _That_ was a Christmas wish come true.


End file.
